Wordless Wednesday

A year ago! A tad blurry, but it was all I could find!

Break.......carpal tunnel and kid updates!

Not much has been going on over here. I am still not typing as much as usual due to my awesome carpal tunnel flare ups. I might try so sleep sans braces tonight..they are awful and get in my way! I have been stretching and self massaging every chance I get. So far, so good!

Miles is doing really well with staying dry. We are now working on staying dry at naps and night time. I really hope this will be the last pack of Pull- Ups I have to buy!! Nap times are obviously easier than night time. I might wake him up and put him on the potty right before I go to bed, which is usually about 2.5-3 hours later. We'll see though.

Amara is doing well too. She is "training" for the kid's marathon, but we have not been getting in her mileage like we should. This darn going to school all day is really getting in the way! We are on mile 10 of 25. The 1.2 mile race is on Oct. 17th.....which means she has to get in 15 more miles before that day. It's possible. I sure hope she does it because she is kind of on the sensitive side and has already cried when I told her she might not get all her miles in! She also told me that when she ran 2 miles ( walk/run) it hurt a little and she did not like it. I told her that pushing yourself is a good thing and it might hurt a little at times! I am not sure she liked that!
Update on myself. I have another blog: Mission Possible that started off as a way to chronicle my fitness/running adventures. I would pick a big goal and then write about the journey to the goal for the most part. My thing is running, but with my vocal cord annoyance I have not been putting in the training that I need/want/should. Well, that and other obstacles ( time, work etc.). I planned on running a half-marathon in less than a month, but have not ran in almost 2 weeks. Not good. So, I most likely will NOT be doing that race. Bum deal! I hope to get back full force training mode in January and am crossing my fingers (and toes) that I am able to run The 2011 Boston Marathon. I qualified last Oct. Sign ups start ( and will most likely SELL OUT ) on Oct. 18th--the day after the 1/2 marathon I am not running!
OK, I better end this post before my hands freeze up!

Wordless Wednesday

30 Days of Self Love

It seems like forever. my carpal tunnel flare up seems to have died down for the time being. I was having fun with the 30 Days posts, but I know it probably would not be in my best interest to make up last weeks entries ( unless I want to be in pain again...and I don't). The good news is I reflected on Tina's posts internally. Writing things down is a lot more therapeutic for me, but I did what I could. Here are a few of last weeks reflections if you want to know!

PURPOSE: What ways do you have purpose?

EATING NATURALLY: Have you experienced any shifts in how you view food?
What are the biggest influences in your food choices?

STOP FAT TALK: What do you do to stop fat talk? From yourself or from others?

These are just a few of the titles that I missed. If you wish to see more, please head to Tina's wonderful site!

Break.......

I did not give up on the 30 days.... campaign! I have awful carpal tunnel ( usually only while pregnant--which I am NOT!) So I decided to take some time off from typing as much....too bad, because the topics Tina has been reflecting on are really good!!! Check her out. I will be back next week.....

30 Days of Self Love--Gifts of the Body 2 ( Day 9)

We need to shift the qualities with which we define them from aesthetic ones to purposeful ones. Hopefully, after completing 4 rounds of this exercise and having to come up with 12 different parts of ourselves we recognize as a gift, we will grow to love our bodies more and more.

I am not sure why these posts are the hardest for me-and I have to do 4 of them. (help).

So far I have my Body, ears, and legs from post 1.

Hands- They look old, have dry skin and the nails are non-existent. That does not keep them from rubbing backs (the kids and Matt's feet too). I am out of practice as a massage therapist, but I retained enough to do some healing when necessary! They are perfect for holding tiny hands and checking for fevers, giving high 5's and playing peek-a- boo too. Hands are great!

Taste buds- Kind of reaching here, but I love food! As a family we love food. I think we ( Miles, not so much yet) are pretty adventurous when it comes to trying new things and love flavorful things. Not just sweets either. I think Amara inherited this from both of us. One of her favorite things to eat is calamari-- the more tentacles the better!

My belly- For being a safe house for my babies. Yeah, so now it's softer and has some markings but that's not such a big deal when you think of what it did. It is such an awesome thing that I forget the pain, discomfort, the HUGENESS. I carried a living being! That's pretty amazing. I saw a 3.5 week old yesterday and it was almost instinct to rub my own belly- I hope nobody saw me !

the posted pic is about 2 months before I had Big Bad Miles ( 10lbs. 10 oz.)

30 Days of Self Love--Perfection ( Day 8)

In what things do you try to seek perfection? Why do you even want it? How does desiring perfection actually hurt that area of your life? What would letting go of the hope for perfection do for you?

I can't say that I strive for perfection in any part of my life. I know that perfection is not attainable in reality, so why even think that you will ever get there. (*disclaimer*-- the 2 things that have been perfect in my life is of course the birth of my kids, but that's a given I think!). You can strive to do your best in your everyday life, but trying to be perfect will just leave you frustrated.

I do strive to do my best in parts of my life, but with that being said, I also slack in areas that I should be trying harder. Maybe I have let go too much..... I am not sure if it's the "youngest child syndrome" or what. I see my daughter ( a first born) and I see how she needs to have things "just right" and does not like to be wrong- EVER, and I hope it's just because she is 6 and not because she thinks in order for her to be loved, she needs to be perfect. I tell her it's OK to be wrong and that it is just a learning experience. I think and hope she will understand this someday.

Wordless Wednesday

First Day of First Grade!

30 Days of Self Love--Perspective ( Day 7)

How do you witness the power of perspective in your life? Do you currently face something where your perspective could make a difference?

I have taken on an "it is, what it is" mentality for a lot of issues in my life. Especially for the issues that are totally out of my hands-I have to. It won't do any good to dwell on things if they can't be changed. Taking up too much time figuring out the coulda, woulda and shoulda is too exhausting and meaningless.

For current issues that can be changed- Take the steps to change them! Am I currently taking my own advice?? Well....I am working on it! Life is a constant work in progress. I sometimes put things on the back burner too long; either afraid to confront the issue or knowing it will be a difficult journey. Something I need to work on NOW.

30 Days of Self Love--Love From Others ( Day 5)

Reflect on who loves you and what they see in you. Do you have trouble believing it and accepting what they see whole-heartedly? Try to think of all those wonderful things about you that others care for and use those to fuel your day.

Good question! I never really question that people love me, or why they love me. I know I am loved. I guess I used to think it was because they had to! As in my family etc. We never said the words too often, but that never kept me from knowing that they loved me. Through their actions as well as their words can let me know - although I don't need to hear it 24/7--it is nice to hear every now and then. It's usually right when I need to hear it too. It's as if they know...

I know my 2 kids love me with all they have. They tell me at least 5 times a day each and it never gets old!

30 Days of Self Love--So We Idolize Our Bodies (Day 6)

How much do we really value our bodies? We may say we don’t, but when taking a closer look at our actions we may find differently. What ways have you put too much emphasis on your body? How can you change that?

Where do I start?!? It probably started in college when I really started working out. At first it was because my roommate loved to exercise. she and I would go almost everyday. After a while I found out how much I loved it and then I started noticing the changes it brought about. After a while it was getting me a lot of attention from guys. I was not a very out going person so this was very uncomfortable to me. That was one part I did not like--at first. I later felt it pushed me to even work out more. I was not trying to get skinny either. I always wanted to be lean and have muscle and curves. (Still do).

It seems that as time went on it was expected of me to always be working out, or to always be in shape. It felt like it was a job and I was always under a microscope--people wanting to know what I did, for how long, what did I eat etc. I felt ( and sometimes still feel this way) that i had to keep it up or else I would look like a failure to my peers and those that perhaps looked up to me. I am not saying I did things overboard--maybe a few times in my day, but that did not last long.

In a nutshell-- I think most of us do idolize our bodies waaay too much. I do want to always feel comfortable in my skin as well as my clothes though. These days and yes, after having my kids I have a new mindset. I want to show my kids the right way to be healthy- not going to the extreme or overboard.

After my rambling-- I have been focusing for a few years on not idolizing my body for the wrong reasons. Nowadays I idolize my body because of what is has done in the past 6 years:

~It has given birth twice to two good sized babies ( Amara was 8 lbs. 5 oz. and 3.5 weeks early Miles was almost 11 lbs. 1 week early).

~I have run 2 marathons, setting a 20 minute PR with marathon #2 and qualifying for the Boston Marathon.

~ I have taught numerous exercise classes to people that thought they were not "cut-out" for it and told me so.

~ I am coming to terms with my ample tummy and not so ample breasts.

~I am focusing on being healthy so I can be here to teach my kids the same.

30 Days of Self Love--Trusting Your Body ( Day 4)

Is there an area where you face difficulty trusting your body? Take time today to focus on this area and pay close attention to your body.

When I think of trusting my body it usually always leads to running ( of course). This year is probably the first time that I don't trust it and it bugs me. I have allergies, acute asthma and something wonderful called Vocal Cord Dysfunction or VCD. Long story short- it started in the spring..feels like a major asthma attack.....I learned breathing techniques.....it rarely happens anymore if at all-nothing as major as in the spring. OK, with that being said-- this is my slowest year ever at running and it is very discouraging. It's a mind game I hope and not so much physical. It's a real downer.

I am trying to focus on trusting my body. I am having trouble pushing myself because I feel I will push myself into a VCD episode and that scares me. I need to trust in my body to use my breathing techniques to get me though if an episode happens. The more I push my body during my runs, the easier it will become. I already know this, but it's good to be reminded. I guess I also need to learn to trust my brain as well, since VCD can be triggered by anxiety and stress. I know I have both of those.

30 Days of Self Love--Intrinsic Beauty ( Day 3)

Day 3----Take a few moments to think how you showcase intrinsic beauty. What positive qualities describe you. Search deep. Through the day consider these qualities. How do they showcase in your life and make you beautiful?

Beautiful is a state of mind. People might be considered beautiful for many reasons- not just physical, maybe not ever physical. Qualities make a person truly beautiful in my opinion.

If being non judgemental is a quality ( I think it is) I think that is one of my best intrinsic qualities. I just don't think it's fair to pre judge anyone. Everybody has a story- you never know what it is until you ask. I know I am pre judged on a daily basis due to the color of my skin. It does not make me sad ( those people probably don't know any better!), but I just choose to live differently and hope to teach my kids that quality as well. I know that I learned that quality most likely from my dad. Thanks dad!

30 Days of Self Love--Gifts of the Body ( Day 2)

Over at Tina’s blog of Faith Fitness Fun, she talked about Gifts of the Body. Thinking about your body as something special that helps support you through your life no matter what. That it is important to treat ourselves and more importantly our bodies like we would treat our friends. With unconditional love and unconditional support.

1. You only have 1 body so treat it right! One of my gifts is just being in good health. That is due to how I treat my body. I take care of it by nourishing it with the things that make it thrive. The food I eat, drink, and exercise.

2. I am thankful for my ears. I am able to listen to my kids laugh and sing and tell stories (thanks Tina!) everyday. One thing both of my kids LOVE to do is sing-it's just a normal thing in our house and in our car.

3. I am thankful for my legs. They may not be the thinnest and never will be. I am glad they are strong and are able to do everyday things such as walk. And not so everyday things such as teaching 2 Spin classes, a sculpting class and then go for a run! Thanks legs!

30 Days of Self Love--self Confidence ( Day 1)

Take a look at Tina's blog Faith, Fitness, Fun . Here is a short explanation taken directly from her blog:

"Welcome to the 30 Days of Self-Love Reflections (30 DSLR for short)!!!! For those of you just stumbling across my site and this movement, the 30 DSLR is to bring a positive change into each of our lives one day at a time. Each day will feature a new topic and message to reflect on and motivate positivity throughout your day and, hopefully, beyond. I look forward to everyone’s participation and the growth it will bring us! Here we go!"

So now it's my turn to reflect on what confidence means to me.

It means to hold my head high as much as possible. I have always been told I have good posture-- sometimes that's all it takes for me to feel confident ( or even fake it just a little bit). It gives me a feeling of confidence just by straighten up my shoulders and holding my head high. Try it!

My other main job ( besides being a mom) is being a group exercise instructor. I would have never in a million years thought I would have made this my main source of income. I was very, very shy in front of people for such a long time. I did not like to speak in front of groups or anything scary like that! In high school I did not look up while giving speeches..I just read my notes while my palms sweated and my voice shook.

When I was in college I started taking tons of group exercise classes. I loved them. I was there everyday--(in the back row!) As time went on some of the instructors approached me about teaching-- I thought they were joking. They told me how well I did in their classes and also said that I had the personality to teach--what the what?!?! Even my close friends thought it was pretty funny ( thanks guys) that I would instruct.

I had to act fast and finally just went for it. This was so out of character for me-but I felt that if it did not work out as least I tried. Well, to make a long story short I have been a certified instructor for 12 years now. I have worked in all sorts of environments with all kinds of people-- and I love it!

I am sure that instructing provided me with the lifelong gift of confidence that I am grateful for.

Other things I am confident in is that I am a great mom to my kids. I am also a great friend to the few that I have.